There is a new Super Hero in town who is taking the law into his own hands. A man shopper's call the Shopping Cart Vigilante. Operating in secret and on his own dollar, the Parking Lot Watchman keeps an eye out for lazy shoppers.
The vigilante watches customers and their shopping cart habits. If a customer doesn't return their cart, the masked crusader dashes to the rescue by physically lifting the shopping cart high up into the air and placing it directly on top of the offending customers car. Yelling, the super hero says..."Which exerts more inertia? Walking twenty steps to return your cart or lifting a heavy cart off the top of your car? The super hero turns with his cape flapping in the wind and disappears into the masses of the parking lot.
When asked, "Why are you doing this?" The masked super hero exclaimed, "It is not transfat which makes America heavy, it is pure laziness and a lack of concern for your fellow human being." As he disappeared, I heard him singing, "I'm making a list, i'm checking it twice, i'm going to find out if your naughty or nice... Ha Ha Ha Ha, the Shopping Cart Vigilante is coming to town."